Going backwards,

I remember being 15, it was a major induction to living. 

I started out my youth with One Direction. I was a die hard fan of them, especially Zayn Malik and Harry Styles. I can't get over the fact I googled Harry Styles every single day just to keep myself updated about that curly haired lad. I even had plans to migrate myself to Bradford, because Zayn lives there. I even had this fake British accent, which was hilarious. However, after trapped by reality I stopped fangirling, only because I figure, I found my true love. Not so true when he bailed from my life and left a deep scar in my heart. Bullshit. 

A story to be told, Zayn was my hero. I made Zayn as my motivation...a huge motivation that changed my life entirely. So, all my life I was known as the ''fat kid'' I am not flabby but I am considered big (?) I have this broad body structure, which runs in the family genes. Thus, there is not much to blame. I was also a fan of food and I was happy. Even though I was corpulent before, my confidences level was at the peak. I was still the outgoing lovable person. Well, I can tell no one was chasing me that time around, maybe I was ugly and puberty didn't came hitting me just yet. 

At the age 16, on February 17th 2013,  I started changing my will. I told myself that it will be a year to remember as it was a massive transition to a new life. I started my fitness journey, yes I am constantly proud about it because it has been the biggest achievement of mine (so far) I was determine to actually meet Zayn Malik, so I told myself that in order to make him notice me in the crowd, I must be the prettiest and by that, with loosing the extra weight I have as a solution. 

It took me partly 6 months to actually change my physical appearance, it's immensely a time consuming process, but it works and it's worthwhile. I honestly exercise every single day, cut down my food intake, even thought I am mildly anorexic. Since then, I've started getting the attention from the opposite sex. I got carried away with the fame and I dismissed Zayn. I was frankly too carried away with my so-called-true-love and the darn attentions I received. Not to forget the increase of haters and some of my close friends even said I've changed (?) Guess what people, it was a massive pain to change myself into something new, hence I deserve it. 

Since I've lost interest in guys these days, I have started listening to One Direction again, still a fan of their old album, which is Take Me Home and frankly speaking, I am awed with Zayn's high notes and Harry's raspy voice. Taken aback to memory lane. Currently, besides fighting for a dean spot in the faculty, I am also fighting for the crazy obsession I had on losing weight. I am going to embrace the fiery spirit I owned 2 years ago. It was strong, solid and most of all brave. Did it once, wish me luck for another beauty experiment.